First attempt/Food diary.

I don't know if anybody will read this, and I don't know that I care, I guess this is just a place for me to spew my thoughts and feelings about things I encounter, and maybe someone somewhere will find it interesting.
Today I started keeping a food diary. See, I hate feeling out of control, but more specifically, I hate feeling out of control with things I know I'm perfectly capable of controlling. It's mostly with small things, for example, I hate it when my room becomes cluttered and untidy, hardly anybody who knows me will believe that statement, but it's true, I'm just too lazy to do anything about it. Well no more! (For now), I've recently acquired the "I'm actually going to try and take control of my life" attitude, for the millionth time, last time I tried starting an excersize routine, it lasted a week.
Reverting back to the topic I initially intended on blogging about; my food diary. No, don't worry, I won't be so boring as to make an entire blog post about the fact that I've eaten soup today, but I'm going somewhere with this, I promise.
I've always been one of those people who fluctuates how they feel about their body image, and it's rarely ever positive. For the last few months I've been allowing myself to become more gluttonous than usual, could be the microgynon, I've heard it can do that, but either way, I have begun putting on weight, which being a naturally slim person I was deluded into believing such a thing to be impossible. Well unfortunately I discovered I am just like everyone else, and am not an exemption to the rule that is over eat fatty foods = start getting fat. 
I've always had a paralyzing fear of becoming fat, chunky, chubby, whatever you want to call it, I don't care how shallow that sounds, I'm an image obsessed person, and it's only natural the image I'm most obsessed with is my own, I can't give a reason for why I think thin is prettier than not thin, but I also can't give a reason as to why I'm scared of spiders. I believe my ability to remain skinny rested on my small diet, (I never really felt very hungry that often until recently), my apparently fast metabolism, and my old smoking habit. As some of you may know smoking can be a minor hunger supressant, if ever I felt the desire for a snack, I'd instead roll up a cigarette, however due to recent circumstances smoking is no longer a pleasant option for me. So I quit.
I believe that by creating a food diary I shall be able to maintain controll over what I eat and how much of it I eat. Now I'm not knowledgeable enough on food sciences to know what I should and shouldn't eat to achieve my ideal weight, so I'm just going to go with, eat whatever common sense dictates is healthy, and don't snack. Unless it's like an apple or something.
If you are reading this blog and are looking for ways to lose weight please don't take my word for anything, what I do may work for me, it may not, at least if it doesn't that's my own life I made a mistake in, if you want to lose weight reliably then ask someone who actually knows.. stuff. 
That's only a tiny fraction of the thoughts that go through my head on a daily basis.


Peace.