duality

My two flares

my aching heart

this retched flesh wound,

this depraved echo

jeering and snide because

I am alive and still

I feel that

this is purgatory

a special hell

just allow me to be sweet about it.

-

it's when I am torn apart

that I feel the music of the world

the desperate thundering beat

bore into me

isnt that sad

when im okay I am empty

I am numb to the cosmos

I can use as many fancy words

I can imbue my thoughts

with pretension

but really

I just feel shit

all eloquence aside

I just feel sad.

I don't feel like anything

and mostly, my mind just comes up with

'I don't know'.